Thursday, March 08, 2007

Suicidal thoughts

No, I don't have any of those. But, I'd be a liar if I said I never did. I think most people get to that point sometime in their life. Where they think how much easier it would be if they just ended it now. To make all their pain go away. To have the choice of how to do it. Will your friends remember you? Parents?

Ok , so this is getting a little dark.

I do have a point, kinda, with all this. It is almost a part 2 of My Story.

So while I was going around and around with my 1st Sergeant. There was this other lady, about a week behind me in the whole getting out of the military deal. We've talked in the hall way. She also stayed in the same dorms as my self. She was an odd little cookie, not sure what she did though that got her to that point. Anyways.

A few weeks after I got out of the military, maybe it was months. I called a buddy of mine at the shop I used to work in. Well, we talk about what has been going on. Where I'm working at now. Things like that. Well I come to find out that she drove her car off a bridge or something. What ever it was, I guess she couldn't take it anymore. Thought she had no place to go. Who knows. She ended it all.

I on the other hand. Think I am a much stronger person for going through what I did. If that didn't bring me down, well ok it did. What I'm getting at, I'm still here. And one way or another I am going to make something of my self. Military or not.


Bardouble29 said...

Many of us have had at one point or another thoughts of "no one loves me and no one will miss me if I am gone" but....

I have so many thoughts on this, suicide is one of those really touchy subjects.

I find it the ultimate act of being selfish. The person committing leaves the true mess for the friends and loved ones to clean up. The feelings of guilt that get left behind are tremendous. Parents wonder if they loved enough, friends wonder why they didn't see the signs.

All I can say, and I mean this truly. I am so glad that, I have had the opportunity to meet you, be your friend and to see you become the fantastic person you are. I am proud to call you a true friend!

Chucky said...

Oh yeah. I agree with the selfish view 100%

I know it is kind of a taboo subject matter. It just happends to be what I was thinking about (the subject matter NOT jumping off a bridge) while driving around at work.

whimsicalnbrainpan said...

Have you ever stopped to think that you have made something of yourself by simply being who you are.

Chucky said...

well kinda, but I'm not done making stuff yet ;)

I got a lot more I want out of life.


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